Variety Show

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Variety Show

Dialogue

210054 01.pngSiren: Ohmigosh, GUYS—wasn't that concert sooooo much fun?

Dragon Songstress: Siren

210054 01.pngSiren: Next time we do a show, will you all join me on stage?

100001 01 r04.pngThe Prince: Er, us? On stage?

210054 01.pngSiren: Totally! You remember how Cleo and Verica were my backup dancers, right?

210054 01.pngSiren: That was LITERALLY the best! Way more fun than being up there solo!

110269 02 r05.pngSummer Verica: I must say that I enjoyed it as well.

100004 04 r05.pngSummer Cleo: I found it quite stressful, in truth... But it was certainly a memorable experience.

210054 01.pngSiren: I'm SAYING! Which is why we should add even MORE people next time. More people equals more fun—it's basic math!

100002 01 r04.pngElisanne: Is there even room enough on stage for us all to appear at once?

210054 01.pngSiren: Sure—but I had something else in mind. Hee hee!

210054 01.pngSiren: I was thiiiinkiiiing... What if everyone did their own solo performances?!

100003 02 r04.pngSummer Ranzal: Ya talkin' about some sorta variety show?

100006 03 r04.pngSummer Luca: Oh yeah, count me in for that!

100003 02 r04.pngSummer Ranzal: Hell, count me in too. Now, what'll I perform...


100006 03 r04.pngSummer Luca: Thanks for coming, everyone! I hope you're all ready to have a ball and a half!

100003 02 r04.pngSummer Ranzal: Heh, no way you're ready for THESE muscles!


210054 01.pngSiren: Ooo, an acrobatic performance—WITH swimsuits! See, this is what I'm talking about!

100002 01 r04.pngElisanne: The point of said costumes is lost on me, but yes, "hooraaaaaay"...


100006 03 r04.pngSummer Luca: All right folks, here we go! Hit it, Ranzal!

100003 02 r04.pngSummer Ranzal: You're about to feel this song right in yer guts!

100003 02 r04.pngSummer Ranzal: Haaaaaaam, succulent soul foooooood! You briiiiing, me tooooo, my kneeeees!


110269 02 r05.pngSummer Verica: Oh goodness, no... This is...

100004 04 r05.pngSummer Cleo: Grounds for going vegetarian, yes. Would someone PLEASE put a stop to this?


100003 02 r04.pngSummer Ranzal: Hey, come on, we're just gettin' to my favorite part! I said HAAAAAAAAAAAAM—

100004 04 r05.pngSummer Cleo: That is QUITE enough.

210054 01.pngSiren: Yeesh, that was the WORST.

100006 03 r04.pngSummer Luca: Er, put your hands together for our next act!

110255 02 r05.pngSummer Celliera: Heh, that's my cue!

100001 01 r04.pngThe Prince: Do you have something good planned?

110255 02 r05.pngSummer Celliera: You better believe it! Not that there was anything wrong with Ranzal and Luca's idea, mind you.

110255 02 r05.pngSummer Celliera: It merely failed to adequately consider the audience.

110255 02 r05.pngSummer Celliera: Passion is great, but only if it has somewhere to go. The audience needs to feel involved! They need something interactive!

110269 02 r05.pngSummer Verica: Interesting. Celliera does train knights professionally, so I imagine she is well-versed in such concepts.

210054 01.pngSiren: Well, she's got MY attention! Drop some knowledge on me, Celly.

110255 02 r05.pngSummer Celliera: Right. So...


100006 03 r04.pngSummer Luca: What, you thought the performance was over?! Not by a long shot, folks!

100003 02 r04.pngSummer Ranzal: It's my honor to introduce you to our armsmaster extraordinaire, CELLIERA!

110255 02 r05.pngSummer Celliera: Listen up, kiddos! Do you want to be STRONG?!

Spectators: Yeah!

110255 02 r05.pngSummer Celliera: Do you want to get SWOLE?! Do you want to sculpt your body into the STUFF OF LEGENDS?!

Spectators: Yeah!

110255 02 r05.pngSummer Celliera: Then let's! Get! TRAINING! We'll start with some stretches. Follow along, kiddos!

Spectators: MUSC-LES! MUSC-LES!

210054 01.pngSiren: Uh, yeah, hard pass.


110255 02 r05.pngSummer Celliera: Huh? What's wrong with "Celliera's Hardcore Training Hour, featuring Ranzal and Luca"?

210054 01.pngSiren: Why's it always muscles with you guys? Where's the like, variety?

110042 02 r05.pngSummer Julietta: Quite right. People attend these shows to witness beauty, not muscles.

110042 02 r05.pngSummer Julietta: As a Paladyn, I am fully prepared to put forth a masterful performance!

100006 03 r04.pngSummer Luca: The heck does bein' a Paladyn have to do with performing?

100004 04 r05.pngSummer Cleo: Hush, you. Let her finish.


110042 02 r05.pngSummer Julietta: Welcome to Midsummer Paladyns On-Stage! Let us begin, Elisanne!

100002 01 r04.pngElisanne: Yes! May our music reverberate through the summer sky!

Spectators: Oh. Em. GEE! They're GORGEOUS!

110042 02 r05.pngSummer Julietta: (Heh, you bet we are! This is what show business is all about, folks! How could anyone resist the dazzling duet of Elly and I?)

110042 02 r05.pngSummer Julietta: (We traverse the dance floor with the same grace we do the battlefield. And it goes without saying that we know how to get people's hearts aflutter!)

Spectators: Hey, Julietta! Show me some love!

110042 02 r05.pngSummer Julietta: (Now, with their guards lowered, we'll flash them a smile so refulgent it turns their hearts to mush and—huh?!)

110042 02 r05.pngSummer Julietta: (Oh, Goddess... Their stares! Ravenous eyes abound, fiercer even than any I've witnessed in battle!)

110042 02 r05.pngSummer Julietta: (Th-the pressure... I can't...!)


110042 02 r05.pngSummer Julietta: Hurk... No... My stomach...

100002 01 r04.pngElisanne: Julietta? What's wrong? You look very pale.

110042 02 r05.pngSummer Julietta: I-I'm fine... I would never embarrass you on stage like—OWWWW!

110269 02 r05.pngSummer Verica: I think you had better rest a spell. Here, come with me.

110255 02 r05.pngSummer Celliera: Is she all right?

100001 01 r04.pngThe Prince: I think she just stressed herself out imagining her performance.

100002 01 r04.pngElisanne: Her anxiety is understandable. Just think, performing before all of those people... And in a swimsuit, no less!

110063 02 r04.pngSummer Estelle: Yes, such indecency should not be permitted!

100004 04 r05.pngSummer Cleo: Estelle?

110063 02 r04.pngSummer Estelle: There could be children in the audience. We have to ensure the show is appropriately wholesome!

110063 02 r04.pngSummer Estelle: Parading about in swimsuits is risqué enough on its own, but to pile an added layer of sex appeal on top is... It's simply too much!

110255 02 r05.pngSummer Celliera: Training's sounding pretty good now, eh? Nothing more wholesome than a family sweating together!

110063 02 r04.pngSummer Estelle: No, no, that's too much! What if somebody pulls something, or gets heatstroke?

110063 02 r04.pngSummer Estelle: You're all off base. Allow me to show you what a true all-ages show entails!


110063 02 r04.pngSummer Estelle: Welcome, one and all, to Sing-Along Time with Miss Estelle and Mr. Euden!

100001 01 r04.pngThe Prince: Okay, everybody on your feet! Just follow my moves, and we'll all have a great time!

110063 02 r04.pngSummer Estelle: We're going to put our right hands in, and then we're going to pull them back out, and then we're going to put them BACK in, and shake them! Everyone ready?

Spectators: Yes, Miss Estelle!

100006 03 r04.pngSummer Luca: Hold up just a second there!


110063 02 r04.pngSummer Estelle: What? Why? Is this not perfectly wholesome?

100006 03 r04.pngSummer Luca: Oh, sure, it's wholesome all right. It's just... How do I put this?

100003 02 r04.pngSummer Ranzal: We're trying to entertain people here, not send 'em back to preschool, yeah?

100004 04 r05.pngSummer Cleo: Your idea does sound like it may be somewhat...tedious for older audiences.

110063 02 r04.pngSummer Estelle: Hmm... I guess you have a point. It's pretty difficult to come up with something everyone can enjoy...

100003 02 r04.pngSummer Ranzal: Yeah, I had no clue this'd be such a headache. I just wanted to sing my ham song...

110255 02 r05.pngSummer Celliera: This may not be a puzzle we can solve in a day.

100001 01 r04.pngThe Prince: You might be right. It really puts into perspective how incredible it was that those three managed to make everyone happy with their concert.

210054 01.pngSiren: Aw, come on!

210054 01.pngSiren: We didn't do it alone—every one of you helped to make it possible!

210054 01.pngSiren: As far as I'm concerned, you ALL starred in that show. You feel me?

100004 04 r05.pngSummer Cleo: I... Yes. I "feel" you.

210054 01.pngSiren: Hee hee! And, to show you how super de-DUPER thankful I am, I'm gonna put on a secret concert for all of you—like, literally right now!

100006 03 r04.pngSummer Luca: Whoaaaa, sweet!

100002 01 r04.pngElisanne: We should go fetch Verica and Julietta.

100001 01 r04.pngThe Prince: Siren, why don't you get set up while we're gone?

210054 01.pngSiren: Aye aye, chief!

210054 01.pngSiren: Okay, everyone, it's time to get LOUD!

Everyone: Wooooooo!

The End